end of day 2

so day two is just about over. i feel like i had my eyes opened to somethings today. oh what forgiveness we all need to give, sometimes even to ourselves. how horrid it feels to know u have intentionally or unintentionally hurt another in a way that has so wounded you in the past. i thank the Lord for the revelations that i received today. not sure if i can handle this everyday for the next 38 days though! but i pray that the Lord would do that, if that be what is needed for me to see things more clearly. in this fast, in must be a matter of heart and will. i wish to be like the prodigal son returning to the embrace of my Father.

i feel the hunger pains today, much greater than yesterday. fortunately there has been no headache, or loss of energy. this must only be the grace of God. i even excercised without feeling too horrible afterwards. for many years, doctors have prescribed fasts for health reasons to patients. it is good for bodily hygiene and it restores the body to an equilibrium. it is often said that after getting thru the first few days, that it enables people to need less sleep, to think more clearly, and work more efficiently. but true fasting must not be only the physical abstinence from food. it must also be accompanied by prayer always. to do the fasting without the connection with God would be pharsaical or worse. it leads, not to contrition and joyfulness, but to pride, inward tension and irritability. we are to remain in relationship and thankfulness toward God for the fullness of the fast to be experienced.

it seems now in the quietness of the evenings that i am regaining a time for myself that i had for quite sometime neglected. i am missing my friends, but i am realizing how much i missed this time with the Lord or just spent in solitude. i love being around people, but re-energize when i am alone. it has been quite refreshing and helpful to have this time when there is much to ponder! i think i will spend some more time with Him, and then go to bed! Goodnight!